Stress Management

For those who specialise in this therapy look for the letter 'C' in the speciality column

Barry Coleman BA(Hons), GQHP, Cert. Counselling, GHR

www.bcoleman.co.uk

Stress Reduction

You can read in many places all about the terrible things that stress can do to you.  I would like to offer my own, hopefully concise, summary and a description of some useful hypnotic approaches that can make things better.

Stress happens to a person when something is perceived to be a threat to their own well-being.  That may be physical or mental well-being or a combination of the two.  The mind and body reacts automatically to this to prepare itself for defence by making physical changes to the body through the release of hormones such as cortisol and adrenalin. This is a “cave-man” response that we still have and often still need.  The nature of most of the threats have changed, however, and most threats will not go away if we physically fight them or run away from them.  Unfortunately, the body’s automatic responses cannot distinguish clearly between the threat of getting the sack and an approaching tiger.  The result is that these physical changes can damage us if they persist over time without any resolution.

It is also true that an awful lot of unhappiness is bought about by persistent stress and damage is often done to personal relationships.  Our whole view of the world will change, very often without us realising it.

It is as if the great advantage that we have over other animals, the ability to think in complex ways and build massively complex social structures has backfired.  We have made stressors that our bodies seem unable to cope with. Our autonomic responses have not kept pace with our mental development.

But this ability to think is where salvation lies.  We have the tools to build much happier lives through thought and our ability to actually train our subconscious minds to react more appropriately.

Hypnotic techniques can be used to give anyone the ability, at any time, to trigger a more relaxed state of mind with, for example, as simple a physical stimulus as touching the forehead or crossing the fingers and so on.  The trigger is associated, using hypnosis, with, say, a peaceful and pleasant place where you feel only happiness.  There are many hypnotic techniques similar to this.

Hypnosis can be effective in supporting a more fundamental and whole life-enhancing approach called “Cognitive Behaviour Therapy” (CBT) or, the more recently developed “Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy” (REBT).  The basis of this is that nearly all of our stress-related unhappy feelings do not come directly from events but from the way that we think about events.  This is difficult to see at first but, for an example, if the boss calls me into her office I might say that I feel anxious about this but, what I really feel anxious about, are the thoughts that I have about this event.  For example, “She is about to criticise my work and this is unfair but she won’t listen and this is all terrible”.  REBT encourages us to forcefully change these thoughts to something more rational and less catastrophic.  For Example, “She might want to criticise my work but perhaps I can learn from this.  It may not be fair but lots of things aren’t fair; we can’t demand absolute fairness.  It will not be the end of the world and I will gain more from this if I don’t get up-tight about it”.

This is an approach often used without hypnosis but hypnosis is a great tool for suggesting a more rational and less demanding way of thinking about events that are not quite what we would wish for.  It can, and often does, lead to a much happier and successful life.

The following article has been kindly supplied by

Debbie Waller, Yorkshire Hypnotherapist. BA (Hons). GQHP. GHR Reg. MUFH

www.debbiewaller.com

Coping with stress.

We all see different things as being stressful. Some of us enjoy bungee jumping, keeping pet spiders or having twenty kids round for a sleep-over. Others can feel their blood pressure rising at the very thought.

The same goes for many other situations, at work and at home. So it’s fair to say that stress is more to do with how we see what happens to us, than with what actually happens.

You can’t always control the things that make you feel stressed (though most of us manage to avoid the bungee jumping). But learning to respond creatively and positively to stressful events helps you feel in control, and reduces your risk of stress related illness.

Therapies such as hypnotherapy or stress management will help you to learn this kind of coping skill, but there are some things you can do to help yourself. Here’s my ten point plan to a laid back life!

1. Get a good night’s sleep. When you don't, you produce extra stress hormones.

2. Buy a joke book. Laughter decreases stress hormones and increases infection fighting antibodies.

3. Yes, everybody nags but it will help you fight off the physical effects of stress if you lead a healthy lifestyle. Throw away the cigarettes, keep your alcohol intake low, and eat as well as you can afford to.

4. Exercise regularly – it produces chemicals in the brain (endorphins) that make you feel good.

5. Relax every day. That’s actual relaxation - not ironing in front of the TV. Take a leisurely bath, get a massage, practice self hypnosis, and switch off.

6. If the kids interfere, encourage them to join you. There are some great relaxation tapes aimed at kids, which you can use as well.

7. Keep your attitude positive. See the time you are stuck in traffic as an opportunity to review that important presentation one more time.

8. Make lists; identify urgent jobs and break overwhelming tasks up into several smaller items. Experiment; do you feel calmer if you get short or boring jobs out of the way first, or if you concentrate on the most important?

9. Make (and use) an action plan. List things that stress you, and decide what you would do about them in an ideal world.
   Think: is that practical? If yes, write down the first step you can take. If no, write down the best of the possible alternatives.
   Say your job is your number one problem. Giving up work altogether might be your “ideal world” answer. You could always buy a lottery ticket, but looking for a new job would be more practical. Your first step might be to contact a careers advisor or look at retraining.

10. If you feel it’s all a bit of a struggle enlist professional help from your GP or a reputable therapist.

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